Engineering quote week 11

Resuming our much delayed 11th installment of engineering quote.

A common mistake that people make when trying to design something completely foolproof is to underestimate the ingenuity of complete fools.
– Douglas Adams –




Engineering quote week 10

Some Skills of Engineers


Engineers have different objectives when it comes to social interaction.

“Normal” people expect to accomplish several unrealistic things from
social interaction:

*Stimulating and thought-provoking conversation
*Important social contacts
*A feeling of connectedness with other humans

In contrast to “normal” people, engineers have rational objectives for
social interactions:

*Get it over with as soon as possible.
*Avoid getting invited to something unpleasant.
*Demonstrate mental superiority and mastery of all subjects.

Continue reading

Engineering Quote week 9

The Top 10 Things Engineering College Didn’t Teach

#10. There are at least 10 types of capacitors.
#9. Theory tells you how a circuit works, not why it does not work.
#8. Not everything works according to the specs in the data book.
#7. Anything practical you learn will be obsolete before you use it, except the complex math, which you will never use.
#6. Always try to fix the hardware with software.
#5. Engineering is like having an 8 a.m. class and a late afternoon lab every day for the rest of your life.
#4. Overtime pay? What overtime pay?
#3. Managers, not engineers, rule the world.
#2. If you like junk food, caffeine and all-nighters, go into software.
#1. Dilbert is a documentary.

Engineering Quote week 6

Engineers are the BEST boyfriends

ALL these ARE facts .. so.. here goes..

Advantage 1: Secure lifestyle.
An engineer boyfriend can provide you with a secure lifestyle. At 27 years old, an engineer probably has a respectable, stable job that gives him a high income to own a car, invest, have a comfortable life, and get married and buy a house too.
Law graduates are still working as a lowly apprentice in a law firm, most management graduates have just failed on their first business plan, the arts graduate is still looking for a job, and the medical school graduate is still living in a hospital. ”-

Advantage 2: Unmatchable industriousness.
An engineer boyfriend will dedicate an unimaginable amount of his time and effort to understand you. Engineers strain really really hard to understand their work. You can believe that they will try really really hard to understand women too, just like how they understand their work, once they believe that you are the one. So even if they don’t understand you initially, they will keep on trying. Even if they still do not understand, they will figure out the correct method to keep you happy (e.g. buy diamond ring = 1 week’s worth of happiness=dh/dt.) And once they find out the secret formula, they will just keep on repeating it so that the desired results appear.
Unlike the Lawyer who will argue with you, the Management graduate who will try to control your spending, the Arts graduate who will ‘change major’, and the medical school graduate who will operate on you. And you know what, it’s really so easy to make engineers believe that you are the ‘one’. Say that you like one of their projects and they will be hooked to you forever.-

Advantage 3: An engineer boyfriend will never betray your trust.
Let me first tell you what is wrong with the rest of the others – the lawyers will lie about everything, management graduates will cheat your money, the arts graduate will flirt, and you probably just look like another cadaver to the medical school graduate.
Your engineer boyfriend is either too busy to have an affair, and even if he does, he is too dumb to lie to you about that.

Hence, an engineer is the most secure boyfriend that you will ever find – rich enough, will keep on trying to understand and please you, has no time for affairs, and too dumb to lie to you. So girls, why procrastinate? Get an engineer as your boyfriend!