Down the rabbit hole …..

Its interesting how sometimes what you have watched , remains in your memory , & randomly flashes in your brain …until than you didn’t realized how much more to the story was…

There was this episode I watched of Supernatural series , the episode was called My Bloody Valentine … & I never gave it much thought , the words and the plot had so much depth. It goes like this , everyone was infected with famine , & the hunger got the better of them , except for one: DEAN; the reason why he was not affected by the hunger was simple , his soul was dead inside , there was this large hole that couldn’t be filled, & emptiness was all he had, no desire , no wishes , no hunger….

 

falling in abyss

 

Its different than the feeling of contentment its like you are falling down the rabbit hole ,& you don’t have anything to hold on to, you just keep falling indefinitely & consumed by more emptiness as you fall more deeply,you lose track of time , everything around you keeps moving & you just cant make anything of it.

The light starts fading & darkness starts pulling you from every side you don’t feel desire for anything , you are getting too cold , too numb , to feel the excitement for anything, everything feels quite , but this is not the comfortable silence , no its the sign of falling into abyss….

The key to it is wake up,its not easy, you need a very strong impulse,a powerful force to pull you out, that will startle you ,and you better do it before you hit the bottom , coz once you hit it, you might recover , but never fully , the injury you will have might be too severe to ever recover completely….

Moving on …. is difficult

moving on quotes

moving on quotes

 

Moving on is a difficult process , & I am not talking about any relationship , I am talking about life in general . When you have been steady for a long period of time , its difficult to adapt new change. Its like learning to walk all over again. You are scared to fall down , its not as easy as it was the first time , coz at that time , learning to walk was new to you , you didnt knew how it hurts when you fall down , you were to focused on the new feeling … But when you start it again , its not the same , you al ready know the feeling of falling hard , how badly it could hurt , & than you stop abruptly , the fear taking control over your , turning into the primal instinct. What do you do than ?? How do you move ??

It also gets frustrating with the more time passes , but you have to make a decision quick , coz time is such a tricky thing , it all depends on right timings ….

The last few days of my life have presented me with amazing opportunities, but opportunities that didn’t come without uncertainty. “Would this be a mistake if I did this?”, “I can’t afford to pass this up.”, “I can’t afford to mess this up.”, “What if things don’t go as planned?”

I have seen lot of opportunities in past , also taken some risks , & it was amazing new experience , but damn its also scary ..when deciding on which to choose … But they were small things , didn’t asked for big time commitments , neither had any influence of any other factors on it …But the ones I am facing now …. whoa … too big ….

As said by someone , the decisions you take in your 20’s make your life in 30’s …..

I’m reminded by another quote I recently came across, “Nothing is risker than not taking risks.”

I feel that this statement fits nicely right before the Mockbee quote. Decide on the risk, take it, then “proceed and be bold” moving forward…..

Gosh even this post in confusing … lolz…

Since quite a time my steps have been falling on unfamiliar and uneven turf; not a bad thing – different. I have always reached, but within that circumference of the familiar and reachable, never looking outside my “comfortable.” Today I am finding, I might have to  stretch my fingers into the mists of the unknown just outside that circle. I wonder if I should – just do it. !!!!

Another wise words I remember from somewhere : If circumstances have knocked you flat on your back, find your feet! Put one foot in front of the other, and moveon. ….

I guess this might be my answer …..